Lagging behind...

*Sigh*, my second post and I'm not exactly sounding happy... hooray dear reader, you're about to hear my very first rant :P

I've got three major stresses in my head right now as I type this, and in fact I had just logged out from one of them. The heaviest-weighing load on my mind right now is the upcoming Finals presentation we have for our Software Development track classes. Basically it's D-day for the entire class and the groups just pray that they don't incur our instructor's wrath, which normally doesn't wind up very well. Trust me, we've already felt a fraction of his wrath and have no intention of incurring it again.

Second, if you may even consider it so, is the ever-so-getting-behind Terra Nova (my very own handcrafted novel). I've been redrafting the first Series for the past four years and still I haven't made much progress in what I consider (and definitely will consider) to be its final draft. In fact, I've reached the sixth Series with an unfinished first, how idiotic can that get XD.

The third stress burdening my head right now and has a good bearing of effects on the upper two is my online life - ROSE Online. Sure, I may be well-known there as the Wikimaster or one of the nice (really?!) Artisans there, but behind that innocent face with the neck-length red hair lies a student in a terrible dilemma. For some reason my gameplay habits in the evening doesn't sit well with my dad, who, for some reason, has taken to being an enemy of online games in general (yeah, right, what do you expect from people who live in the past, damnit!). In fact, he always uses my online gaming "hype" (i call it hype or dedication, but he calls it addiction - ADULTS, so narrow-minded to new innovations, for heavens sake!) as a good weapon to throw at me whenever I do something that doesn't fit his "ancient standards", which include a various range of misdeeds - from simply waking up in the morning to staying awake playing late at night.

Honestly, I do know that I've been making a lot of mistakes myself, having been unable to get a decent sleep, all thanks to sleeping from 12-2am or so, depending on the mood, or maybe there's just something wrong with the way he wakes me up. When my mother wakes me in the dead of the morning every tuesdays and thursdays for my class (thats about 5:30-6am), I normally wake up even in her calmest call (and normally first - i dunno why, but maybe it's my attachment to my mother that does it) whereas my dad (whom i never had any inclination to be attached to) has already yelled at me at 7am for my MWF classes and still I fail to wake up. he even has resorted a few days ago to nearly hit me just to wake me up (yeah, he can be violent sometimes but what the heck, I've endured no better things whenever he gets angry) and he has even warned me that I ought to quit ROSE if this keeps up.

Quit ROSE? I'd rather DIE!

Which is why I'm in a bit of a depressed daze lately... haven't been able to think straight, think correctly, even act normally. It affects my studies, like it or not, and I am not ashamed to say that ROSE and my IT studies had formed a link that must never be broken - lest I go mad in the schoolwork tension. In fact, it is ROSE that fuels up my determination to get things done over with quickly. This is one thing my dad had always failed to see, no matter how many times I shove it up his nose. He fails to see the values and the "community life" in this MMORPG. He has shut himself in a world wherein his beliefs are the right ones and nobody else's belief could sway him, especially mine. He has always believed that ROSE is just like any other game, you get hooked into it and you just play for the sake of fun. He fails to notice something deeper than just the game, and as long as he doesn't understand that part of my lifestyle we will never have a quiet time with the issue.

Mark my words I will. I have endured his attacks on my online life long enough, and as long as I can play ROSE I will endure it longer. To show him that online gaming is not just gaming, but being with a community.

*sigh*, and I have given my first rant... yeah, boring read, maybe a guidance counselor ought to be the best reader for this one :P, but as it is, see you all next time, and I hope it won't be a rant then.