The Return of the School Age

It's been more than six months - or maybe nearly eight - since I last sat down on a classroom to listen to an instructor impart his knowledge - or maybe knowledge from a reference material - from his understanding to us students, and frankly speaking, the experience of the past internship coupled with the rusty brain that I seem to have developed now starts taking its toll upon me as it scrambles to restore my mind to its original alignment.

It's not that I've gone dull or forgot my basics during the eight months of legal absence, but it's more on the fact that I've gotten used to the lax activities at the workplace which does not involve much thinking and worrying. Now that I'm back in school, with all these projects, paperworks, and assignments that need to be dealt with, I'm once again reprogramming myself to handle them the way I used to.

Study-wise, my techniques haven't lost its touch, though, as I still maintain my usual performance during examinations and class participation (thank goodness for that!). My only worry now is restoring myself to the usual stress of schoolwork - the overwhelming burden of the assignments and projects. Sure, it's a tough task, but I muddle my way through somehow as Grit of Advance Wars say.

Still, despite my efforts, I still manage to make it a point to play my handheld games once in a while at school (and at school at that!) . I've recently gotten my hands on a PSP so I've expanded my collection of gaming interests somewhat, with the number of RPG and interesting games that the PSP has. On the evenings, though, that's when I start working.

Sadly, one part of me seems to have returned from its eight-month slumber, twice as influential in my brain as before, and that is the brainier side of me. You see, whenever I end up doing something, my brain works full-time in cooking up an answer or a solution to that particular question or problem. While it does not take much time and effort cobbling up a response, it does take up most of my attention as I try to weigh down on the possibilities and the concepts that I have in stock. I try to make the explanation as complete as possible, then set it down on paper as I go along with the question. I write by ear, so to speak, similar to how musicians play by ear. Whatever sensible piece comes to my mind that jives with what I currently have in writing or speaking, I write or say.

The sad part there is that I get easily worked out when I think to the point that I'm almost unreachable. Think of it as Sherlock Holmes, who, when immersed in a particularly complex and baffling case, tends to ask Watson's leave from the house or to be particularly quiet for a while as Holmes weighs down the case in his head along with tobacco or some coffee. I seem to have channeled that same brainwave as well since I really end up like a thinking machine when I start thinking up, and interruptions cost me dearly, sometimes ending up with a half-finished statement that I'll end up erasing. That's how writer's block often knocks on me when I write my novels (which has happened countless times, even up until now).

Hm, I am not so sure myself if this has ever happened to many students like me before, but the impending amount of schoolwork that keeps passing through us lately has somewhat taken its residence in my head and now keeps me spinning and spinning in thoughts on resolving them. While it may appear to some that I'm being in a carefree mood, as I most of the time am, my insides are actually at work, turning theories and concepts apart as I work on the hidden burdens of my academic and emotional mind in secret.

Still, I try to find time for a lot of things - for myself, for games, and for her, of course. Although I hope it doesn't turn out to something awful - I wouldn't want an old argument to resurface again. Guess I need to work on managing my time more intensively. Ah, well, I'll muddle my way somehow through this torturous schoolwork *laughs*